just come out here and I will go home with you...
you dont need to remember merediths name haha. only jane
We just walked into this party and immediately got handed a grilled cheese sandwhich....
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
I forgot how few teeth there are in this state...
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
All I really remember is thinking that the music looked like beautiful lizard waves in my head
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Like, you've got the smoothest dick in the west. Do you moisturize?
Yes I do
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
I got so many dick pics last night. It was like a slideshow from heaven.
I even put my vibrators back in the bedroom instead of the coffee table. If that's not growing up then I don't know what is.
Randomize
