party started at 10. cops are coming to shut us down now and its 11. i already lostmy underwear and im wearing a sparkly thong on my haed. this has to be some kinda record.
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Hey, so, you were my "one phone call" last night... Thanks for not picking up. See, this is why I never call you.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
Umm... When he walked in I shot him with my confetti gun... It's a wonder my booty calls even show up.
sarahs drunk and is drawing dinosaurs all over the apartment. should i stop her?
whats she drawing them with?
eyeliner
no that's ok
Whose house did we sneak into and play beer pong for 4 hours at last night?
I honestly have no idea
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