Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
Saying he's good in bed would be like saying Soulja Boy is a good rapper, completely unlogical if you've heard him.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
they still hired me even though my background check came back with a warrent for my arrest.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Watching the blind side bc I need a good cry to make sure I'm still human after this weekend's questionable life choices
I couldn't find the oven mitts so I used a thick stack of tortillas
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Looks like I accidentally stole two of your beers and left my pants at your place.
How did you leave without pants?
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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