I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
Her boobs were tiny. I could have used her bra as a blind fold. Which in hindsight would have made things a lot better.
Can we please just celebrate being alive this far into the school year and just get drunk?
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I put on pants and a bra for you and you never showed up. There is no forgiveness for that.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I also have bagel bites. I know that's not as big an incentive as the cocksucking but.....
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
The Lion King Is on YouTube
Until 2 minutes ago I actually had a chance to pass my midterms... thanks alot
You had a 45min conversation with the Ronald McDonald statue I have the video to prove it
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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