I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I'm just saying, no one has ever made me laugh or cum as hard as you do. Sometimes at the same time which I didn't know was possible. Is there even a word for that besides love?
more embarrassing than that time i showed up to class in my hoodie and leggings because i over slept, and then as i zipped my hoodie down i realized i didn't sleep with a bra on or a shirt
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
I think I'm goin to jail but either way I had a blast.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
I woke up with a dick pic from the ex-Mormon via email. Not really what I wanted to see before my first cup of coffee this morning, but I gotta say, I'm impressed.
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize