There's a man in a pair of gray footie pajamas and a paper crown watching the kids at the playground. It was easier to tell who was a pedophile before Where the Wild Things Are came out.
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
if i actually bought condoms for every time i had sex, i could single handedly fix the economy
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
So what's the verdict on pumpkin smoothies with vodka? I puked.
Tonight just feels like one of those I'm going to lose a shoe nights.
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
It's a piss down the stairs of the hotel kind of night
Dude shes not that fat. Plus, last night I probably would've done it too.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
You wanna know how bad I feel? I couldn't get out of bed to get the remote, so I just downloaded the comcast app on my phone so I could change the channels
On another note- any interest in going to a gay bar to hit on 19yr olds?
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
