I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
We had an indepth conversation about his employment at Arbys..
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
A very confused plastic surgeon just called. Apparently I called asking how much it costs to get a vodka funnel installed straight to my brain...
Just cried to my husband about how much I'm going to miss my boyfriend... Maybe marriage is going to work for me after all
Can we go one day without you telling me that your dick misses me
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I honestly think sometimes all you need is a $2 alcoholic punch poured from a jug into a big glass to feel better. I guess abblebees is my new problematic fav
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