i just googled "what is oprah really like?" how do YOU think my night is going?
i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
We've been fucking since Friday.... This is the most committed non-committed relationship I've ever been in
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
He let me keep his flannel as a "good job" for the great head I gave him.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
He took me by the hand and ordered me to make him vodka soup.. I think I like him?
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
It was like inception, a dream, in a dream, in the back of a dodge charger.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
I think I may have just taught my whole hall how to give a good blow job. So this is college.
I texted him in the morning wishing him a day as spectacular as his dick was.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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