Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
Gym doesn't open till 11. I'm sure that of the other four people waiting in the lobby, I'm the only one still drunk and only going to the gym to shower.
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
Tonight I think I'm going to go out with a french braid so I don't wake up with puke hair. Thoughts?
And your mom thought you weren't even thinking about your future... she would be proud
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
He kissed my hand AND my forehead. I don't think this virginity business is for heartless whores like us.
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
I wish I got like a congrats basket for being a responsible sexually active member of society complete with condoms, tissues and lollipops.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
Write this down so you can tell me in the morning. "That bartender needs to be in my mouth."
Getting blackout drunk infront of my family was never on my bucket list, but now that I've done it I'm cool with it.
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
Randomize
