she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
I don't know where your sunglasses are, I was too preoccupied with girls not old enough to drive past midnight.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
all i need in life is blowjobs and white cheddar cheezits
unrelatedly i think im gonna download boogie nights just to see mark wahlberg's penis
Housekeeping called in a homicide detective. Just spent an hour explaining that we had vigorous hotel vacation sex five times, even though I was having a heavy flow day. It'll definitely be what you call a memorable honeymoon.
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
Well then sir I'll probably see you tomorrow after my class and at 3 with your clothes off. Sounds like a solid way to start the weekend to me
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
My dad made a joke about you sending me strippers for valentine's day so clearly everything here is normal
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
At least get laid and waffle fries out of it you whipped basterd
I am now gainfully employed. Parents, lock up your children.
Yay! Welcome to the world of "you're seriously trusting me with your kid?"
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