i don't care what she did to you. we are not having sex in front of your sister.
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Actions speak louder than pants.
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I'm getting turned down for sex. Apparently my "sexual appetite" cannot be satiated even by a man who's such a deviant he went to prison for jerking off in his car.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
my ex logged me out of his netflix so im gonna fuck his bestfriend as revenge
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
Stupid Covid-19
The universal cock block of this decade
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