I just shaved my legs while pooping. classy or trashy?
talent.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
This morning I learned I traded my sunglasses for a Big Lebowski sticker at the football game.
Dude I am not desperate enough to pay my dealer in change. Maybe tomorrow.
Katelyn drunkenly ripped the soap dispenser off the wall so we decided to call it quits
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
Brightest idea yet: lets drink enough at ladies-drink-free nights to make up for the cost of tampons. Breaking even on having vaginas!
Is it weird that I was turned on when he told me he had a vasectomy?
I knew you two would hit it off
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
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