I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
A guy dressed like Jesus just gave me a mini keg. Prayers really do come true.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
Why can't burritos get me drunk
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
We have had more Sex in the past 48 hours then we have in the past 3 months. I think it was from me dressing up as Darth Vader.
Of course, it's a law of friendship. "Thy friend Shalt always hold hatred for thine friend's swinish ex"
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
Make a note to pack something that won't catch shell casings in your cleavage
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
