i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
the only thing i have to deal with now is the fact that i'm still wearing spandex shorts from last night
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
He spanked me with a plate. I'm not sure where this is going...
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Shut the fuck up. It's not the end of the world. Now come get your asshole bleached with me or we're not roommates anymore.
Oh god now he thinks I'm into him because I've been staring at him trying to figure out what animal he looked like
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
TSA found the edibles
Fuck
Oh my god he just. Swiped them for explosives and handed them back to me
God bless California
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize