fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
My life is like the prequel to "40 Year Old Virgin"
i think the cat found all the blow we lost...
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
All the alcohol I spilled on myself must have acted as a disinfectant or something. I haven't showered in three days and I still don't have a staph infection from sleeping on the lawn with you.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
And then we made hashbrowns with vodka and queso.
I just listened to "Eye of the Tiger" and did 5 shots to prep going over to see him.
He hasn't responded, but he probably just jizzed in his shorts again, so I'll give him time.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
Personally, if my roommate had a nice friend who made me dinner, gave me free beer, a 4am meal, a couch to sleep on in an apartment on the beach, and breakfast when I woke up, and I found out that said roommate was fucking her, I'd be all... right on! She's cool! Thanks for the quesadillas!
At a bar across from the city police station. I PROMISE I will do something great.
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Randomize
