Revelation of the day. Bulimia is dumb. Anorexia is easier.
You suck.
so stoned i ashed in my jack and coke like 4 times. drinking it anyway
I think I might stay on campus instead of going home for thanksgiving and see how many townies I can hook up with and no one will be around to judge
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
We ran out of wine so we are trying the absinthe you brought over from Spain like 3 years ago. Please call me at noon tomorrow. If we die, its your fault
My mom just saw the bruise on my chest from the bite mark he left. Played it off that I hit myself w a box of beauty products. She believed me. God I love working retail sometimes.
I gave him 3 xanax and recorded the ball drop. He's gonna think tonight is New Years.
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Also, your girlfriend apologized to me about yesterday. That was nice of the cunt.
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
I think vodka/water/skittles totally beats your crystal light mimosas
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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