Joe is yelling at the trees again.
any plan I had today of being a productive member of society, I am officially throwing out the window.
Using pokemon references during sexual acts is always a good idea.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I voted for him because his wife supports his raging sex life.
Our halfway to Halloween party needs to never happen again. There were waaayy too many wasted cartoon characters passed out in my living room this morning...
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
IT'S A HOLY FESTIVAL. A BUDDHIST CELEBRATION OF PENIS.
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
Is it bad that I've been making new friends through your vagina networking? I don't think so
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
Mimosas make me so tired. I just ordered a huge thing of pasta and gonna eat it in my underwear like a bad bitch
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