I think most guys look at porn as a fallback career. I mean I know I do.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
Too bad it's not "confirm, ignore or not unless I've had 20+ beers"
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
If the blowjob was before the wedding, we're not technically related, right?
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
we went to the bar with our boss and you tried to play a song from the atm machine
While eating post sex burritos I dripped taco bell sauce on my boob. He licked it off and asked why I hadn't thought of that before.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
Oh okay well are you handling the "just sex part" like a professional hooker like I taught you?
Just sent a dick pic to ur girl. It was accident. Plz mail it to Gena.
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
Did you ever hear the story about the time I did blow in a bar bathroom with the #1 ranked golfer in the world?
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
Randomize
