Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
I'm drunk at The Bachelor casting call in Cleveland
I cherish every text you send me
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
Drunk. Just jacked off for the third time in an hour. I love not being Catholic anymore.
We're playing a drinking game to 'how to train your dragon'. has it really come to this?
I found a horn on the street but it's okay I disinfected it with vodka
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I ended up naked in a pond with you-know-who and your saying your a good babysitter? Dick.
I'm so sorry man. Roger cartwheeled into a signpost and cut his face open. it was pretty messy so we all went into panic mode.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
I'd cum for enchiladas.
and it's like......my shirt is off and he's talking about quidditch. why.
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize
