so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
But he found my shoe...that at least deserves a handjob.
Uhm; your sign says 'Welcome to KFC' and for some reason I can't seem to open the door.
I wish the sun would stop judging me for being drunk while it's still shining.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
Incase you were wondering. Cooking naked turns into sex. Sex and cooking may lead to house fire....
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
i'm growling thTa how much i wNn slwwwp.
save me some of whatever you're doing i'll be there in five.
I know you’re not my dad, but you’re someone dad. And you’re also like a second dad to me who I also send nudes to as well. Happy Father’s Day
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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