He has such a weird drunk-voice.
dude, he's deaf.
I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Peter invited his little brother to smoke with us and he is trying so hard to pretend he's done it before. When he saw the weed he was like "hell yeah!" and everyone got completely silent and just looked at him
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I found out my butt plug has a metal core at the airport security checkpoint...
I was drunk while I accepted my job offer. Here's to growing up.
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
Have you ever drank bourbon in your underwear while wearing a Santa hat and reflecting on the decisions of your life? Asking for a friend.
how do you know everyone's mad at you?
I just woke up feeling shameful
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
Randomize
