I can text with my tongue
Iced coffee. Banana. Two dumps. Life is good.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I woke up to him peeling the skin on my stomach from my sunburn. If he wasn't so good in bed I'd be a little freaked out.
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Drinking a grey goose and water in a random chair that I found by the road by myself
So there's that.
just remember the most important rule of taking psychedelics: monsters can't get through blankets
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Never let me go online shopping while drunk. I now own 2 baby cribs. I have no children
Crop dusting thru forever 21
Randomize
