He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
What are you doing tonight?
Watching dora the explorer and pining for a sex life.
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
Everytime I think about NYE, my gag reflex kicks in.
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
votings over. no more wacking it to anti christine o'donnell ads
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
Some might say its sad that I am willingly picking up a coke habit to be the skinniest bridesmaid... I think it shows my great dedication and proves I should have been maid of honor.
I lost the bet. I now have to do all chores sans clothing of any kind. I give it a week before I'm knocked up...
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I gave him a HANDJOB.
But then he finished from a handjob in under two minutes so who's really laughing?
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