Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
He said he got a lot of action last night. I asked how much? And he said he got to see down her shirt. Freshmen never cease to amaze me.
We found her in the fireplace eating dog biscuits.
I gave an inspirational speech to a bum and called a bride ugly at her wedding reception.
How do I discreetly dispose of sex toy packaging that is recyclable? What to do...what to do?
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Well you finally jumped into that tree you've always wanted into and some girl gave you an 8.5. You were very happy.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Looked like a bag of smashed assholes and smelt like a brewery - still got morning sex. Marriage rules sometimes!
at crossfit today a guy shit his pants while deadlifting 405 lbs. coach made fun of him then congratulated him on his new personal record.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
Dude 4th of July week was our like 5th anniversary of you sending me dick pics ❤️
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