Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Just saw a drunk guy marching down the strip with a garden rake. I feel compelled to follw him
This soccer player girl is eating this banana WAY to slow. Too early for penis shaped foods.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
Its not the fact that i woke up wearing a tutu that bugs me its the fact that i have 75 photos of me wearing a tutu on facebook
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
See and now you're talking. I am like the fairy godmother of hook ups.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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