Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
my mom heard me say 'don't squirt that at me' while me & him were in my room. She then decided to call my aunt and complain to her that she has the sluttiest daughter in town. she refused to believe me when i told her i was talking about gel.
I'm with your mom on this one.
Get condoms and clear your schedule for the night. I'm bringing chinese food!
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
my head hurts. i need an adult
and not like a cool parent adult. like a full fledged party pooper grandparent adult
Why is there a chicken nugget nailed to my front door?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
I told him I had an IUD and he asked me how was a bomb a form of birth control..
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Randomize
