Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
The sweet smell of jungle juice and bad decisions is calling our name.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
its really sad that i have to specifically make this a rule but, absolutely no lighting smoke bombs indoors at my birthday party.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Hey its me your friend who impressed the pharmacist by already knowing the generic version of plan b by name
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
Drinking and decided to streak in the apartment fountain. Canadian goose shit and sharp rocks on the bottom. I sobered up quick. That was a very bad idea.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
