Best walk of shame ever - Brown Hennesy shirt, bright blue overly large basketball shorts, stilettos from night before - ended up buying a ton of 40's and a 30 pack of coors.
Where are you?
A place I should not be.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
at least you know where his tattoos end, so it wasn't a complete waste of time.
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
She looks like a character that batman would try to kill, or something.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
Randomize
