You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
If I have to go to the hospital can we stop by the liquor store on the way?
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Hahah. They reconnected again?
Like with his penis I guess
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I don't understand why you're so excited, it's my vagina not yours.
My vibrator box just fell off the table and hit my cat in the head, he is a little stunned. Good thing I went medium size
AHHHHHHHHH. I LEFT A GLASS NEXT TO ME WHEN I FELL ASLEEP I'M SO SURE IT WAS WATER BUT NOW IT'S VODKA JESUS MADE A STOP
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
You shouted "my financial aid just came in, who wants a shot?!" Half the bar followed
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
