There were 3 chicks in my bed I didn't know when I got home. Now I know all of them. Biblically.
Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Leaving the dealer's house. He just gave me a sincere hug and said good luck. This cant end well.
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
Mother fucker, I knew it was bad when you tried making out with my car window
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
There was a comma in between her and dick. I was calling you a dick. Jesus.
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
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