Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
It's shit like that that makes me wish being deaf was contagious
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
I was dressed in monkey onesie serving people vodka jelly with a spoon...
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
Amanda, I can 99.9% assure you i'm probably never going to bang your mom
I DON'T LIKE THAT SENTENCE
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
Randomize
