Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
I showed him my bush... on skype.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
Code red. She won't talk to me. Maybe it has something to do with her raccoon eyes. Perry said there was a brief moment of towel fighting until you passed out. Did you draw the turtle on my ass?
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
So, we bought a knight today. Nearly life size. Hes in the garage, so don't be startled.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
I just thought you should know.... I am fully committed to being a ho this summer
I woke up in his closet, with my shirt inside out and backwards, Rolos in my hand, a tortilla with a face carved into it stuck to the fridge with a magnet, a homemade bong next to the bed, and the door off the hinges... I need a chaperone.
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