pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
please keep texting me so i can pretend someone likes me
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
he thanks me after handjobs.
you found the perfect man.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I would accept a super bowl ring as an engagement ring
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
Randomize
