her vagina looked like a handful of raisins.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
well he is only 50 percent black.. but after last night i am 100 percent not going back
The first clue should've been that he literally had shit in his hair. How does that even happen?
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
Serio, who the fuck falls down coming offstage wearing nothing but pasties, a g-string, and a fake moustache, and now suddenly needs a tetanus shot. Me. That's who.
I'll say this one last time. You are TWENTY FIVE YEARS OLD. You are not going to die alone and this is not the twilight of your life. Stop taking shrooms on your period!!!!
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
The night got way more interesting after Jimmy started doing summersaults in front of the bar.
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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