Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
maybe tonight we can turn coloring into a drinking game
Nothing screams don't date me louder then having your baby as your profile pic
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
seriously who else gets carried home puking from a fucking mary kay party?
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
It figures that the only time one of my videos on Snapchat gets replayed is a video of my Hedonism Bot impression and NOT my nudes
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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