Have you ever slowed down next to the oldest people on the highway while getting road head just to see their extended reaction?
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
just heard someone say they saw a guy puke while riding a bike across campus without stopping
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
How do you say "I'm sorry I beat you up while cumming" in German?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
So it's safe to say that it's all down hill from here
Do you mean easy livin or downward spiral of alcoholism and disappointment
We did Irish Car Bombs out of butter trays, the influence of the retired community is astounding- I didn't know people even owned more than one butter tray.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
is it bad that there is a girl in my bed right now and the only thing i can think about is the fect that its after 3am which means i cant order jimmyjohns unitll tomorrow?
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