you can't spend the night you always smell like dirty underwear and my roommates complain
grandma shit on top of the toilet
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I'm 90% sure a girl here is wearing a bra strap as a headband.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
This snow needs to melt so I can get wasted on someones front lawn
I lost my bra, he lost his virginity. Seems like a fair trade off.
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I'm not the kind of girl that sleeps with someone else's boyfriend. But I'm getting waxed just in case I change my mind...
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
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