when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
you tipped EVERY employee at white castle
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
She hash tagged the word blow job in her text. Tonight's going to be good.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
My professor just told me I'm living a lie and I found puke on my pants. How do you think it's going?
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
It was a shot marathon. It only ended because we werent drinking in our house apparently we walked into the nieghbors. When they got home thy were soooooo pissed.
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
you poured beer in your mouth so you could be a beer pong cup for her to drink out of/make out with
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