then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
It was kinda bitchy last night when i brought up my pregnancy scare and you said "shotty playing with it"
he borrowed my computer and saw his name in my recent google searches. Things got awkward real fast.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
there's no excuse to just assume your pants won't be coming off for some reason or another. that's just irresponsible
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
So I had sex with a hook nosed, lisping masadonian last night.
Glad that degree in literature is paying off. Nice adjectives. Maybe set the bar a little higher though?
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
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