Please tell me its not ok to love a 17 year old....no matter how hot he is and how sexy his eyebrow ring is oh lord
All I have in my fridge is chocolate cake, pizza, spicy mayo sauce, beer, and weed. I love college
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
does anyone know how to get red sharpie out of a white cat?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
Her voice kills me. Its the perfect pitch to fuck with my hangover.
His personality is sparkling but nothing beats his ass
I'm actually really happy I can say that my first body shot was out of a gay strippers massively ripped chest
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
My manager caught me going taking a nap in an empty room. Apparently she sleeps there too.
It's less than a hour into 2020 and I already want to punch some people in the face
Randomize
