is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
A 14 year old with a teardrop tattoo just tried to sell me weed. I'm in the wrong fucking neighborhood.
i'm surprised you didn't wake up. like i literally came when he was fingering me as i was spooning with you and all you did was mumble "that's a good idea, mom" and pull the sheets away from me.
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
I think I am calling out of work due to a hangover. I'm 96% sure there ISN'T tampon stuck inside me.
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
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