Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
And I was aware of my actions - that is not a penis I will say no to until I have a ring on my finger
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I called him and he said hell call me back hes in the middle of his kareokee song he was out by himself and his dog
My taste buds are fucked up, everything tastes like fire after last night.
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
Burritos, beer, and hot tub sex. Merry Christmas to me.
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
sorry bout the carpet, but you DID call it "blackout punch" not "don't vom on my floor punch"
No reason. My tongue went numb after one shot. I may die tonight
Randomize
