they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Please stop using the dehumidifier for your weed.
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
Just get over here and light metaphorical fireworks in my literal vagina
He bought me shrimp and alcohol and referred to himself as daddy. I am in love.
Just an FYI you do have to wear pants to lunch
Don’t worry I was with my ex husband for 10 years and he could never remember the year I was born, when our dating anniversary was or what year I graduated high school. But I still know that mother fuckers SSN lol
Nows a good time to tell him. Just be like "yeah, I used to bang her too and it didn't work out for us either". He'll understand.
Randomize
