the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
Most guys don't get turned on by "skinny, gangly legged girl with glasses laying in bed touching herself." You better start working on your diction if you're gonna keep up the sexting.
he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
screw that ipod for my birthday.. i just want a weed brownie the size of my face. that's all.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
On the airplane today the pilot actually said "Ladies and gentlemen I'm sorry for the delay. But I know all of you have problems, and so do we..."
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Nothing like cleaning dried puke off your floor to make you feel like you've failed as an adult.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
I just had sex with the Sheriff's Deputy. You should call me.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
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