I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
Im the macgyver of cooling down beers. The toilet tank was blocked so I couldn't use it.....
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
It was like getting a handjob from a frost giant
Rick just drank rum out of a dog bowl after a dog already drank out of it.
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
He said he loves me but he haven't eaten me out yet. So I don't think he means it.
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
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