I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
I just texted him to come over because I want to see if his hand fits the handprint bruise on my ass.....I feel like the cinderella of S&M
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
My mom gave me a high five when I told her I was just using him for sex
You and your mom would make an amazing tag team
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
Oh, I'm sorry. I'd rather be "doable" than "the fat chick"
I stumbled in at 6am to find my cat in the window making a noise I've never heard her make. When I went to the window there was a goat outside staring at us.
Are you sure? Or did you just think there was a goat?
No there was a goat. I gave it a donut.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
guy in front of me at the pharmacy just asked the pharmacist for 2 Plan B's and replied with, "If your wondering, then yes I did have a threesome. It was amazing".
I thought you just gave him blowjobs and he criticized your drug use.
I just laughed at the word pudding. I have no idea whats going on right now.
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
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