They use the phrase "final warning" so often the words have lost all meaning.
I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Seriously, it was like sucking my thumb.. and im not even saying that to be spiteful b/c he is a really nice guy.
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
dude...I wrote 15 jersey shore quotes on her body. she is going to do the walk of shame with snookie on her forehead.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
You then began crawling around in the grass with a magnifying class saying you were searching for the magic school bus.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
It looks like the misc $300 credit card fraud might have been our taxi cab driver who wouldn't take boobs as payment. No wonder...
Welcome to drunk texts. Live from Margaritaville, it's Saturday night!!!
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I ate icecream cake off your tits for my birthday, if that's not love I don't know what is.
I woke up next to a Big Mac box.. And had no sheets or clothes on. The night was a success I think.
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