ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
Fyi: he's overweight and balding. My biological clock is ticking so loud I can't hear the TV.
ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
did u really fuck my little sister???
im not saying yes or no but just know that my answer rhymes with "mess"
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
He just did a 33 second keg stand with a fractured leg, busted chin and chipped teeth from running into a parked car after winning a race.
Tis a story best told in person, it involves a golf course, police and vomit
It usually does with you
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
I had to have the guy I went out with last night come pick me up from the hotel the next morning after I ditched him for a firefighter..don't even talk to me about a walk of shame
I just need to get a little drunker before I realize I'm not straight
You would critique a dick pic. Damn art people.
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
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