I just saw the dad from "Little People Big World" at the airport. I chased him down and congratulated him for beating the DUI.
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
They just kept handing me shots and saying welcome to college
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
I could not actually bring myself to utter the phrase "donkey cock" in front of my father. Not possible.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
She was grinding on him and then she was eating a Big Mac. Who the hell brings a Big Mac to the club?
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
just almost had a panic attack because i couldn't find the granola bar i put in my purse. i miss klonopin.
He didn't even realize I was drunk. He probably just thought I loved Torchwood so much that I no longer knew how to use my thumbs
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
His dog hid my thong. Let me tell you, the last thing you want during a commando mini skirt walk of shame is lots of wind. There’s a church congregation that knows all my business
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