i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
And that's when I found out that Patrick wasn't in fact down with O.P.P.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
The worst part about being a grammar Nazi is all the porn I skip over because the titles are misspelled
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
And you hate the library
Yea but I love drugs and my grades
God, I missed his penis.
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