i may or may not be watching the land before time
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
Just hit a cone using a lit sparkler. Tastes like I might die but it was magical.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
I broke a glass at the bar and ended up with blood on my forehead. I apparently kept screaming BLOOD like the little boy in that YouTube video.
I just realized I haven't had a date or a potential possibility of a date in about a year. Then I realized I wanted to actually go on a date. But I'm sitting here getting high instead of being at a party. Life.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Well I didn't spend $7 on an Uber just to get limp dick
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
