nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
just to let you know its hard to talk to your father while being fingered up against a car..
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I'm FaceTiming Pizza Hut.
Your argument isn't valid... just because I test the waters doesn't make me gay. Makes me versatile. And who doesn't love that!
She yelled out "MCDREAMY" mid orgasm
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Don't worry about us we're making Mac and cheese
MAC AND CHEESE ABORTED, WE HAD FIRE
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
Randomize
